Skaro - The Doctor

How did a race come to only know hate? The Doctor could never quite understood how could a race be boiled down to simply one single emotion, yet it had happened. At times, he simply couldn't wait to strangle every single living item that label themselves as Dalek, other time he simply held regret and remorse for this race. Then again, the pure emotion of hate had fluid the Doctor for a very long time, even the encounter of the Master could not erase his hate for the Dalek. It was simply too personal. Simply... simply... he had lost the ability to describe this event for thousands of years, it still stings upon the tip of his tongue.

The Doctor would point out to any willing by-passer that wouldn't judge him upon every move that had been made previously, that even the Master couldn't spark so much emotion among his twin hearts. Alright, the range of emotion he given toward his wife would be only his private section of 'emotion'. It is on reserve. No. The Dalek ... they stir far too many memories for the Doctor's mind. Far too many.

In the pit bottom of his mind, the Doctor always knew he had encountered the Dalek almost on every turn of his travel. Some easily sorted, some not so easily sorted, and there were those he simply hated the actions he himself took to ensure no other would suffer. The Dalek had caused far too many drops of blood spilled upon his hands, it was these blood that reminded the Doctor he was far from... mercy to all species.

Here the Doctor stood among the same room with Davros.

The mock, the taunt, the creepy laugh from Davros was simply making the Doctor sick. He hated it. He stared at furious the Davros. The words echoing among his ears as he walked slowly and around Davros as he wondered what had this genius got up in his sleeve this time.

"Why did I ever bother to let you live?"

The Doctor asked with hate seeping through his words, his fist clutch together as he walked close up toward Davros. However, deep among the Doctor's mind, he recalled why he let Davros lived, it was the mercy of forgiveness that was long installed into his mind lead him to let this happen. Simply... his wife had reminded him, all time shall pass and all evil shall return to none even it would take forever to achieve. Indeed... he had witnessed a rise of evil to be only rammed over by time itself. Time was the greatest weapon against all living things. Though, how many death could happen between the rise to the end?

Of course, Davros being Davros would have made plans to go against him. The Doctor being a fool in a way that hopped for a drop of mercy among Davros was once again diminished. It sickens the Doctor more to know Davros had linked every Dalek with him to supply his own sense of need to be 'immortal'; what kind of race, correction, creature... monster would do such things to any sort of living being? Actually correction again, the Dalek don't have the mind. The Dalek are a race that only understand the word 'hate' and 'follow the leader'.

It seems....

The question had always been there for the Doctor, how much hate could a race really hold? How crazy was it to build a race base upon the emotion of hate?

The Doctor slowly closed his eyes as he saw the planet of Skaro blow up. He stood there and thought for a long moment... Mercy.

The word mercy.

Of course. Mercy.

Gallifrey - Time War

There are many regrets in the Doctor’s life. Some smaller ones that he easily got over it, some he simply could never forget. One of the things he could never forgive himself was bringing his wife to Earth. Once in a while he argued in the back of his mind, that bringing his wife to Earth was the only method of preventing his beloved wife to forever time locked in Gallifrey.

He still recalled the start of the Time War. The burning of the great cities of Gallifrey as the Daleks came gushing down from the skies destroying everything that held beauty on the planet of Gallifrey. The cries of the children echoed through the broken buildings as they desperately scramble to get away from the Daleks. Nothing could be done to save his beloved people from those dreadful metal creatures. Those creatures that were built to only hate and destroy anything in the pathway of their victory.  

If these sites weren’t enough to break his heart, it was the sound of his wife suffering in deep pain gripped his twin heart the most. She was the core of Gallifrey, any suffering on Gallifrey would reflect deeply onto her body and soul. She was time of the Gallifrey planet. He was almost shattered into tears by simply seeing her body slumber into deep pain. It was pain that he couldn’t simply brush away nor shared onto his body that would help easing the pain.

He remembered well the day he begged the Sisterhood to take his beloved wife in for shelter, while he would ran into war on Gallifrey. He recalled well. The sisterhood granted him a forceful incarnation that would allow him to protect the land of Gallifrey, a chance to maybe save his beloved wife into ultimate destruction—the destruction of Gallifrey. Tears were trickling down his cheek as he drank the potion the Sisterhood gave him as he was forced into incarnation. The painful scream his beloved wife held was she panted for the last of her life was so badly embedded into his mind that he almost collapse after his incarnation. “Nooooooo.” He painfully reached out his hand hoping to grip onto his wife’s hand as he feared to lose her. Every second was a count. Every second was the last ticking of his wife’s time.

The battle of Gallifrey, it was a blur. Everything after the battle was a blur. The Doctor could only remember he managed to time lock Gallifrey with a weapon that might have even destroyed the whole Gallifrey—he wasn’t sure which happen first. He was than force to incarnation again as his conscious self-refused to be the destruction person.

The last part… the last part of this whole event that had scared him the most, he took his unconscious wife in his arms as he cradled tightly. Tears falling down as he made one last decision. The decision to bring his wife toward Earth, the very start of earth as he would kill her on the very stone that would start the formation of earth, it was a process to bind his beloved wife’s time line from Gallifrey toward Earth. It was the only method to let her live. The only one he could think of.

Later, over the thousands of years the Doctor held. He wonder if he could redo everything, or even undone every action he done at that single day. He wondered if he could save his wife from the tragic that had happened. Maybe for once she would still able to live in a healthy body, and able to travel with him everywhere?

They had paid the price. They have.

The price was paid for Laveda to be alive. She was time. Time mingle into another time stream was dangerous work. The action the Doctor took to let her live again gave the heavy price.

She was formed from a collection of time in an immortal body on Gallifrey, and this collection of time was broken down as the Doctor made the sacrifice to bind her onto Earth. It made her body turned into a mortal formation; she was thrust into the cycle of incarnation.

If those were only that price, there wasn’t much to complain. Though, it was the price of seeing each other that was something they both hesitated to pay. It was the price of bringing a paradox into the earth with each meeting they met. A collection of time that became the scattered of time while a scare of time shall never collide well.

Laveda never recalled well what went through the battle, she never recalled much. It started with her body feeling a dull ache that shall never be waver off. It slowly migrated into a low heated fever that got the Doctor worried. Last, she was in constant pain that she was barely able to stand up straight anymore. It was that moment her husband decided to stand up for the war, to end it so the pain that was inflicted onto her body was forever stopped.

Memories were shuffled around. Timeline were all a jumble as her eyes flicked around trying to gripped reality as she wonder about her surrounding . She could hear the sniffles of her husband near her. She tried to grip onto him as she normally would to comfort him. “I’m so sorry.” He words still echoed through her mind as she saw the blade in his hand. She gaps as she closed her eyes and rolled her head back accepting the actions her husband was doing.

It was later in years that made Laveda wondered, if she did protest to those actions her husband done. Would things have change? Sure the time line of Gallifrey would become even further disoriented as she was forever suffering from the forever time lock of the Delak with the Time Lord battling in eternal. Just that thought made her shuttered, maybe undoing the damage wasn’t that wise after all.

Every Time Tot was taught from the start, every change in time line would bring its collision actions. It was the same in this principle, the action that the Doctor did was done and the collision had happened. Was it the best?

In the end, she was healthy in a way on Earth, while still able to see her beloved one once in a while. Even though once in a while with each incarnation she held she see the sad face hung onto the Doctor’s face, and she knew well every time what to say.

“I forgive you.”

“And I love you.”